Adventures in online dating, Vol. IV

oops, i did it again

Remember the awkward one, the one where one guy I was talking to – unknowingly – warned me about the guy I was supposed to meet the next day? Well, I did it again!

I just came home from a date with M. M is a great guy. There weren’t butterflies after our first coffee date last weekend, but as we were having great conversations on the phone, I thought I’d give it some time. Maybe he’d grow on me.

M picked me up for dinner, bottle of wine in his hand. He had remembered that it was my birthday a couple of days earlier. That and being picked up for a date are gestures I highly appreciate. It was thoughtful and sweet without being too much. Off to a great start!

We drove into town and I loved his choice of restaurant. Lively, great food, nice atmosphere, but not too romantic. He is smart and easy to talk to, and as the evening progressed, I found myself fancying him a little bit. So much so that I contemplated leaning in to kiss him – and I am usually not that forward.

Our conversation ventured into separations and divorces, and how grateful we both are for the respective relationships we have with our previous partners. How different it can be and that we both know plenty of stories that are just horrible. He mentioned a friend whose ex killed her mum and sister (!), another friend that is currently embroiled in a nasty custody battle, and an ex whose previous partner abducted their child to Norway.

Now, while all of these stories are blood curdling and chilling, the last mention got my special attention. I felt the heat creeping up into my cheeks and my heart going a little faster. Because I had heard that story before. But could it be? LA county houses close to 40 million people. I mean, what are the odds?

I gingerly asked for her name, and there it was again: I managed to find a man who dated the same woman my ex dated not long ago.


And not only A WOMAN – it’s the only woman I had a bit of an issue with. My ex and her met through his work colleagues, who also happen to be my work colleagues. To make it even worse, one of her good friends is a woman who directly works for me. The whole thing made me highly uncomfortable. I am usually happy for my ex when he finds someone he likes and wants to spend time with, but I am glad that it is over. I don’t like to mix these things and I value my privacy at work.

I am considering playing the lottery. With my luck of finding the needle in a haystack, the odds should be in my favour.

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